For those who may simply not know how different chess pieces move, a) you're on the wrong page and b) the marvel I pay homage to here must sadly, for now, remain unintelligible.
That's not me being smug or elitist, it's more a case of how I imagine I could deal with a kind offer from Stephen Hawking to `explain the Universe' to me, one on one, tete a tete, over a Remy and Monte Christo, given that I can't tell a quark from a quasar.
"Oh, c'mon Stevie, cut the crap, everyone knows electricity boils down to magic in the end!"
If, however, you do play chess but the term `Babson' means nothing to you yet, then I implore you, please read on.
For this post is about a masterpiece of creativity, art, intellect and perseverance.
It ranks, in terms of aesthetic perfection, as highly as the most mature, most refined, most celebrated works of Bach, Mozart, Leonardo, Michelangelo or Shakespeare.
In sporting terms it represents, in terms of magnitude of achievement, something akin to an amateur golfer winning all four majors, each year, for ten years straight.
It is, quite simply, the most sublime chess problem ever composed.
But, let's just get my chess credentials squarely on the virtual table here.
I relate to Chess in much the way I imagine Tiger Woods relates to synchronised swimming: I'm aware of the phenomenon but a tad hesitant to call myself a proficient practitioner.
Of course, not having an iota of talent for any given pursuit is no bar to observing those more blessed; often doing so, as we do, with a complex mix of awe, admiration, occasional rapture and, let's be honest, even more frequent envy.
Or, in the case of Americans and myself - when watching Cricket - doing so with a truly profound sense of confusion and despair.
I guess that's why we call spectator sports `spectator sports'. We enter the Arena. Sit secure in the gallery. Engaged. Applauding.Yet, we're always free to depart without personal blood on the tracks.
Spectator sports defined: sports in which very, very, large numbers of people who can't, pay very, very, large amounts of money to watch very, very, small numbers of people who can competing for... obscenely large amounts of money.
Which bring us seamlessly back to Chess. Chess is to spectator sports what Osama bin Laden is to the Nobel Peace Prize.
Spectator Sports and Chess.
Call me old-fashioned, call me picky. O.K.,so I can't quite finger it - but you just know there is a disconnect in there somewhere, right?
Even when `BobbyJames' was at his peak, back in '72, before going completely barking, the world watched his demolition of Spassky less in the hope of witnessing an innovation in the Najdorf, or whatever, and more in the hope of witnessing that nice young `American' smash chairs over wicked Soviet heads.
Watching a game of chess, even for chess players, can make watching paint dry suddenly seem like an irresistably attractive life-style option.
But solving chess problems, can be altogether more enthralling and engaging.
And solving this chess problem, I promise you, will be immeasurably rewarding to you.
So, finally, here it is: The Holy Grail of all Chess Problems.
White to play and Mate in 4. Against any and all Black defences.
(Just click the board to enlarge )
I hope those of you encountering this problem for the first time will really persevere in attempting to solve it.
No pain no gain. But the gain in solving this yourself and in marvelling at the exquisite intricacies of the variations involved along the way, is worth more than a little pain.
Enjoy this `ultimate masterpiece' of chess-problem composition.
If, eventually, you do feel inclined to `give up', then you will find the solution and a fuller, more elegant, exposition of the problem here on Tim Krabbe's great website:
But, as the lyric encourages: `Don't give up!'
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